Wednesday 17 March 2010

Life. You know. Stuff and other things

It's been a while since my last post. Couldn't really top the whale thing really so just kept quiet. And things have been busy. Here's a recap of the last two weeks or so -it's an eclectic mix with no real theme other than the merry madness that is my life:

I turned 37. As my lovely husband pointed out in my birthday card, I am now in the heartland of my mid-to-late -thirties. Thanks dear.

I was given (by the same man) a cross trainer. Before you shriek "How rude!", I asked for one. I figured that as I never, ever have time to exercise (because taking two kids on a run isn't a good thing) I would just exercise at home. I knew (as did he), however, that the cross trainer would simply gather dust in a spare room unless there was some incentive for me to get onto it. So he also got me a TV and DVD player and the box set of Sex and the City, so I now have my own personal gym (spoilt I know). I have found though that SJP has less pull power than RPatz in Twilight. I can cross train for hours watching him.

My children earned purple belts in karate. I believe this has nothing at all to do with their skill and everything to do with incentivising their parents to keep paying for expensive lessons. And even more expensive gradings every few months. However, they were so incredibly proud of themselves as they were awarded their shiny belts (complete with dragon motif - whoa cool, check that out mum!) that it made remortaging the house all worthwhile.

I have attempted to fit two month's worth of work into one, as the children and I (sans husband) will be flying to New Zealand in two weeks time. We're heading off to see family (at last!) and will be gone for almost all of April. Don't forget me when I'm gone. But more importantly, do give me your top tips on how to survive a 30 hour flight with two small boys who are very much like dogs. See the next point.

I have often said that small boys are like dogs. They both need to be fed often and run even more often. However, this week it went a step further. I was in the shower. They were tugging, yanking, pulling at each end of a soft toy (a dog incidentally). Neither would let go. They were growling at each other and I could tell that one of two things was going to happen. The toy dog would rip in half or one child would lose strength and fall over backwards into the loo. But I was naked, in the shower, soap on my hair. What was I do? I tried yelling. It fell on deaf ears. So I opened the shower doors, took a handful of water and flung it at them. It worked instantly, just like dogs. They were horrified and called me a meanie, but I simply tucked it away into my 'mummy strategies that work' folder for future use.

I have toyed with a new business idea. A business that would involve cake. And pretty cups and saucers. And other girly things. It was originally my husband's idea, but I have girlified it so much that it is now unrecognisable to him. I might reveal more on this if I decide to go ahead with it.

I have questionned the unfairness of life as my friend's IVF failed again. And despite the moment of envy I felt while I was suffering from an extreme hangover crossed with a cold, dealing with hyper children on Mother's Day morning while she got to have a leisurely lie in, I know that I wouldn't trade motherhood for anything. It's so easy to take little things like spontaneous cuddles from sleepy boys for granted, when you get them on tap. And I vowed not to take them for granted ever again.

And that's been about it. How about you?


Dorset Dispatches said...

When I first read it I thought you had got a cross trainer, as in a man who is going to shout a lot at you in manner of army boot camp. Felt a bit fearful. But loving the idea of throwing water at your boys. I shall store that in my own mummy tactics that work as I WILL need it at some point.

Julie Sardinetin said...

Sorry, can't help on the 30 hour flight advice - can only wish you luck and tell you I am insanely jealous of what you will find at the end of it :)

nappy valley girl said...

I find turning the cold shower on them when they are misbehaving in the bath is a bit of a winner.

Although usually when I try things like that it backfires and they ask for more!

I don't envy you the flight either...but do you have a portable DVD player? Littleboy 1 was fine on our flight to the states, sitting in front of his favourite films.

Anonymous said...

Some little similarities to my own life twanged as I read this - the dog similarity - in my case the way they whimper and lie on the floor when they want something out of reach - the New Zealand trip, no family there but three weeks a few years ago created some of our most magical memories, the Mother's Day hangover after we dined with friends till 2am for the first time in as long as I can remember....
Really enjoyed your post, have a fantastic trip - as for the flight - calpol and lots and lots of snacks!!!

Anonymous said...

Forgot to say, I too dream of a job involving shabby chic crockery and cakes! Can't wait to hear more x

Home Office Mum said...

Brit in Bosnia - definitely don't need a cross (grumpy) trainer shouting at me. It's bad enough having to do the exercise in the first place/

Julie - thanks - am personally not thinking about the end destination. All eyes are on the 30 hour hell right now.

Nappy Valley - we have a portable DVD player but am hoping the flight has movies showing as am not convinced of the dvd's battery life. sigh

Babygenie - I'm thinking Calpol might not be strong enough....

Anonymous said...

Re 30 hour flight - if you're going via the Far East its probably a night flight out which is easier (although this works for daylights going via LA too if you up the dose!) - don't forget favourite cuddly and PJ's and a good selection of toys etc.
Step 1: dose with liquid Piriton every 4 hrs (decanted into 100ml Calpol bottle to get thru security). They will awake on the dot after 4hrs so dependent on cabin and eta, allow a brief run round causing havoc to prevent dvt, then repeat step 1 above. (until they get wise to the taste, after which it can become a bit more tricky)
Trust me. Ex hostie married to a longhaul pilot with a 2 yr old. (and the Piriton advice was from a pharmacist!)
Oh forgot, most importantly, step 2: large glass of wine (to help you ignore the disapproving looks).
Good luck!